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  • Pierce Fenwick, Staff Writer

10 Things Cannabis Cannot Do

Around the world there are millions of true believers in the powers of cannabis and its myriad compounds - most of which are still not well understood after continuous use by humans since 500 BC.

To these true believers, the headline above will sound alarms.

Is this going to be another piece of propaganda about MARIHUANA and other CANNABIS CANARDS?

Rest assured, friends, that headline is the best kind of fake news.


  1. Cannabis CANNOT CAUSE AN OVERDOSE. Well, theoretically one could smoke enough cannabis to create a fatal reaction, but good luck smoking 1,500 pounds of pot in 15 minutes.

  2. Cannabis CANNOT GET YOU AN SBA LOAN FOR YOUR BUSINESS. Yep, that was political.

  3. Cannabis CANNOT RUIN A POLITICAL CAREER. That is, if you just say you used it and move on to an important issue. In fact, here's a State Governor who bragged "We've got the best weed" on national television

  4. Cannabis CANNOT REPLACE ALCOHOL ON THE LIST OF DANGEROUS SUBSTANCES THAT CAN KILL YOU. Because as every thoughtful person knows, alcohol has been legal for decades and still kills 88,000 Americans every... frickin'... year).

  5. Cannabis CANNOT BE USED TO HELP VETERANS WITH PTSD, or chronic pain, or sleep, or anything else, as long as they're under US Government care. Which is stupid and cruel.

  6. Cannabis CANNOT REPLACE BEER in the American shopping cart. No matter how many times you hear this, don't believe it.

  7. Cannabis CANNOT PAY FOR ALL THE SCHOOLS IN COLORADO. Cannabis taxes contribute about $40 Million to Colorado schools each year - and additional cannabis grant money is available, but this is not the entire amount that's needed.

  8. And finally, legalizing Cannabis CANNOT INCREASE VIOLENT CRIME. Unless the government makes cannabis banking illegal, flooding American streets with Billions in cash... the Gov wouldn't put Americans in danger like that, would they?

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